What Your Dreams Are Saying
Excerpt from Chapter 45
I was rarely able to remember my dreams. But one night I had this strange dream that I had accepted a job with the city. When I arrived on my first day there was no one there. I sat and waited. Finally, people showed up with Christmas decorations. I noticed that there were no administrators. It was Columbus Day and the office was closed. I asked about the office being closed and was told that administrators were off but everyone else had to be there. They were setting up for Christmas (a little strange since it was Columbus Day).
I was shown to my desk and went to put some things away. When I returned, my desk had been moved because they had to make arrangements for the Christmas decorations. My desk kept getting moved and everyone totally ignored me or treated me horribly.
I think this dream had to do with me going home in time for Christmas. The moving of my desk represented all the things that kept changing in my life, and the lack of friendliness or being ignored represented people who had deserted me when I became sick.
I think my dream was saying what I could not say out loud or even acknowledge to myself; I was never going to make it back home. I had arrived in Dallas in January 2003 in anticipation of having surgery and returning home six to eight weeks later. What I had not anticipated was what would happen to me after surgery. My body would not respond well to the anesthetics and trauma from surgery. I would lose all the antigens to help with food, molds, chemicals, and pollens that I had fought so hard to get just the previous year. My return date kept getting pushed out further and further. One thing after another would force me to stay just a little longer and then a little longer.
I had this dream in September of 2003. By this time due to an error in a prescription dosage, I not only had lost my ability to take the medication, but had to stop testing until my body calmed down. I had been in Dallas nearly nine months and I didn’t have much hope of returning before Christmas if I could even make that deadline. I believe my dream was preparing me for what I could not yet face emotionally; the possibility of being away from my family through the holidays.
I still don’t remember my dreams except on rare occasions and usually it is just bits and pieces of the dream. None has been as vivid or well-remembered as this dream. Do you remember a particular dream that you think was telling you something? Did you connect your dream to what was happening to you in life?