Posted in golf, humor, life, Personal, Uncategorized

Moon Over Forrest Park

I’ve been going through some of my older blogs from Facebook and decided to share them here. I hope you like them.

Tonight’s story, from 2008:

Moon Over Forrest Park…This is a TRUE Story!

So I come home from work today and my husband greets me with a note. The note was from a Baltimore County police officer via an Anne Arundel County Police officer.I was perplexed.I only venture into Balt. County once or twice a week, to visit my mom at the nursing home in Catonsville and I knew I had no incident there in the past 2 years.Since the officer who delivered the note was vague about what happened and said it must be about an “accident”, my husband assumed it was me because my truck was hit a while back by a hit and run and we never heard anymore about it.

Curiously, I dial the phone (push the buttons) and this very nice officer answers, “Hello Officer _______ this is Mrs.Stankiewicz can you tell me what’s going on?””Yes mayam. I know it’s been over a week but can you tell me if you were driving in the vicinity of Ingleside Ave. and Forrest Park Drive on Sunday August 24th at approx. 12 noon?”

“Well, no. I didn’t leave here until about 1pm to go see my Mom.”

“Can you tell me where your mom lives?”

“My mom lives in a nursing home in Catonsville off of Ingleside ave.

“Were you the only person in operation of your vehicle that day?”

“Yes sir I was. Can you please tell me what this is all about?”

“Yes mayam, apparently someone was in operation of your vehicle near 695 and I70 and stopped and the passenger of the vehicle proceeded to get out, walk around the vehicle and moon the other motorists.”

Okay, at this point I’m thinking, I’m seriously being punked or I’ve entered the Twilight Zone.

“WHAT!? I had my keys with me the entire time, there is no way anyone else had my truck!”

“Mayam, we have a witness and do you have a sticker on the back window of your truck?”

“Yes I do it’s a Ravens sticker.”

“Yes mayam, that’s it. So your vehicle fits the description and yet you are saying that you were near Ingleside but this was NOT you?”

“Is this a joke? Seriously officer this is a joke right?”

“No mayam you can call the other number I sent you and give them the report number and they will assure you that this is NOT a joke. Is it possible that you’re husband had your truck?”

“No way. My husband was golfing that day with his buddies, (aside to my husband who had no clue as to what the offficer was telling me)

“Honey, where did you play golf last Sunday?”

(My husband)”Forrest Park near Ingleside.”

Just then, it clicked.

“Officer, was this truck black?”

“Yes mayam, I thought you knew that?”

“No. I think you need to speak to my husband.”

So I proceed to hand the phone to him.My husband and I have the same truck. His is black. Mine is not. We have the same Ravens sticker on our trucks.

Apparently, while leaving the golf course, one of my husband’s buddies decided to play hijinx and hop out of the truck at a red light and moon his buddy in another car. Stupid and silly?YES. Unfortunately, there was also a car with a family in it whom the husband and wife did not find this funny at all. Whatever. Well, even though the officer tried to reason with this person, they insist on pressing charges for a 2 second moon so now, they are wasting the time of not one but 2 police districts because somebody showed a little hiney on the highway and they are calling it indecent exposure.There may be some who think this was completely innapropriate and childish for a grown man to do but c’mon! For crying out loud. Pressing charges?? For a 2 second moon?!Apparently, they had two kids in the car at the time and they said they will go to court if they have to over this guys arse!

Well, here’s my point of view if you don’t already know it.This is the most absurd, rediculous crap i’ve ever heard. To waste an officer of the law’s time, make that two officers from two different districts and threaten to “take this to court” over a childish prank because their kids may or may not have seen some stupid white guys rear end for 2 seconds. Even the officer sounded disgusted and as hard as he tried not to, I could even hear the humor in his voice on the phone as to how rediculous he felt having to even pursue this matter.

So, my point of view is people need to lighten up and laugh. This was NOT indecent (although the guy that did this is a goofball but a nice guy who wouldn’t hurt a fly) and I see more butts walking down the road with thier jeans under their rear ends day after day and no one ever bothers to report them or press charges on them. Well…I’m done my rant. The offending rear end feels really bad about the whole thing and has offered to write a letter of apology to the family.Would you accept that if it were you?

Thanks for reading and by all means…keep your butts covered. You never know who’s looking.

By the way:

mooning_gnome

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mooning

Lookie what i found:USA

In 2006, a Maryland USA court of appeal determined that mooning is a form of artistic expression protected bythe United States constitutional right of freedom of speech.[4] [5] The court ruled that indecent exposure only relates to exposure of the genitals, adding that even though mooning was a “disgusting” and “demeaning” act to engage in, and had in addition taken place in the presence of a minor, “If exposure of half of the buttocks constituted indecent exposure, any woman wearing a thong at the beach at Ocean City would be guilty.”
Defense attorneys had cited a 1983 case of a woman who was arrested after protesting in front of the U.S. Supreme Court wearing nothing but a cardboard sign that covered the front of her body. In that case, the Washington D.C. Court of Appeals had ruled that indecent exposure is limited to a person’s genitals. No review of the case by a higher body, such as a Supreme Court took place, since the States Attorney dropped the prosecution after the ruling.
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Author:

Writer and Artist in no particular order of importance. They hold hands.

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