I’m feeling the ughs, the ho hums or whatever you want to call them. I have no idea why as we as human beings normally don’t know why. Unless of course I’m the only person who ever has these days, which I strongly doubt. Fortunately for me, they are few and far between. No get up and go or excitement of anticipation to do anything. I could go swimming but the pool is too cold. I could go sit on the deck and just feel the warm air but nothing and I mean nothing interests me today. Lousy company thy name is Peggy.
I’m not depressed or lonely or bored, I just have no desire to move from this spot. I tried to begin a new project or continue an unfinished one but the brain cells are firing in so many directions all at once that I can’t focus. Yesterday, I was having some serious leg pain but I at least had the desire to go sit by the pool and even take a shower and go to the grocery store. I’ve been surfing the apps on my phone and watching “The Walking Dead” marathon and I’ve also been a bit haunted by a strange dream I had last night. It was one of those frighteningly vivid dreams that although not frightening per say, was so vivid I woke up and couldn’t believe it wasn’t real. No, I don’t want to talk or write about it and I don’t think I could shake it off even if I did.
I used to call days like this, “I can’t even stand myself” days. These were those days when every little thing got on my nerves, including my own face. Days when I just wanted to stay in bed and sleep or read or write or just pull the covers over my head and be quiet. I’m writing this blog in hopes it snaps me out of it but I still feel that anxiety in my chest and I’m still sighing and can feel the edge of a headache coming on. Maybe if I could climb up out of my head, I could climb off this couch.
Well, noon has arrived so I’ll force myself to my feet and get busy on the laundry and clean up the breakfast dishes. This too shall pass as it always does. Tonight, I’m sure I’ll be back to my happy self again.
Anybody have a crane I can borrow?